Why don't I complain?

1. I don't complain about the government because I didn't have any role is choosing my representative. I just voted once in my life time.

2. I don't complain about the police, because my hand goes in the pocket every time and pulls up 100/200 bucks when i am on the wrong side.

3. I don't complain about the bureaucracy, because  I left that road for the lack of money and the hard work involved.

4.I don't complain about the rowdy  because he/she doesn't trouble my family

5. I don't go ahead and protest on the roads, because I like spending time on Facebook, sharing how bad I felt eating bingo and refreshing to know how many people liked it

But overall, I don't change myself, because deep down i believe that No matter what ... nothing will change and I am just another selfish brat who thinks he has lot of his own problems to deal with than of the country, who segments his problems and that of others in top priority and no priority buckets, who has learnt that the people are no good to live for .. Live for money and for yourself....

I am just another Indian who doesn't understand that his "self" is useless unless it's meant for others..


PS: I disown any of the statement above for the selfish reasons of not being detained.

Restless ... again !!!

This is just another Saturday and this is just another me, restless all over again. 

I completed the book "How I braved Anu aunty and set up a million dollar company" by Varun Agarwal, a 25 year old bangaluru boy. The book is simple , a breezer without much ado on the language, but the message is strong. 

"Screw it, Let's do it!" is the key message in the 100 odd pages in which Vikram tells a tale of his life on how he chased his dream in spite of the numerous critics around him. The book reminded me of 3 idiots all over again in which Madhvan says "Mujhe tho unka first name bhi nahi pata". Seriously, I don't know about others but I admit i closely identify with someone who is living someone else's life, just for the sake of what some x y z would think.

Some people have always had a distinct place in my life, sometimes intentional and sometimes it just happened. But the sum and substance is that those mr and mrs invisibles do influence what I think and what I do. 

SP Jain helped me realize the futility of such relations or pressures; but I guess 2 years was too less to make me indifferent of the anu aunty's and uncles of the world.

It's not fear of criticism that makes me conform to them, it's also a contempt that I have for some of them that can't stand any criticism. I believe that they are too inferior to comment on what path i choose but at the same time i dread a situation when they pounce on me to tell me "we said, you are no use"

In-fact, when i look back, all that i did was to impress some x y z. I made it a point to prove and hell did I prove the doubting Thomas's that i am just not a good for nothing guy. But, it didn't really matter in the end, Did it? The Thomas are living their live and I don't find any sadistic pleasure in their sulking.

Yes, what does feel good is how the people who really care about me feel because of all this.It's important to see them happy, isn't it ? It feels good that they are treated well and your bits of glory has been an enabler of the same.

But someday, I need to claim this life of mine and live it on my own,the way I want it to be. The big Q is when is that day? Do I see it in the near future ?

The answer is "I don't know" and I am restless because I want to know ...

|| सरहद के उस पार ||

पल में जश्न, पल में  ग़म 

आँखों में कहीं उम्मीद  के  मोती  

गुच्छों  में उलझे सोच के  धागे 

बीखरे हुए मोतियों से वक़्त से किये वायदे

कभी किसी लम्हे  में अश्रु  की यह धार यूँही बहती है 

सरहद  के  उस  पार  भी  क्या यही  कहानी चलती  है ।

पलकें बंद  करके सपनों  में  खो जाना 

खट्टी मीठी यादों से दिल को बहलाना 

मंद मंद मुस्कान के साथ आँखों  का नम हो जाना 

कल की याद में आज  को  भूल  जाना 

क्या अक्सर यह गलतियाँ कहीं और भी होती है 

सरहद  के  उस  पार  भी  क्या  यही  कहानी  चलती  है ।

दिन बदले , मौसम बदले और गुजरे बहुतेरे  बरस 

मनं मेरे क्यूँ तू आज भी ढूंढे वही अरज ,

उन गलियों  में अब यादों  के रेत बहते हैं 

जिनमे हम अरमानों  के  फूल  सजाते  थे 

क्या  सुमन की भीनी खुसबू और कहीं भी आती है ,

सरहद के उस पार भी क्या यही कहानी चलती है 

आज कुछ  भी  कहीं  नहीं  है, फिर भी साँसें चलती हैं 

दिल अलग, धड़कन जुदा फिर भी दुनिया जीने कहती है  ....

क्या  सरहद  के  उस  पार  भी  यही  कहानी  चलती  है ||

PS : Inspired by one of my fav movie - veer zara

क्यूँ रोकूँ मैं तुझे |

क्यूँ  रोकूँ  मैं  तुझे ...

तू  निर्मल  जल  समूह  धारा प्रचंड 

मदमस्त  बलखाती  लय  पर  सवार 

नदी  नाले  वन  सजीव  विजयी 

अपनी  धुन  में  मंत्रमुघ्द अलाप  

क्यूँ  रोकूँ  मैं  तुझे ....

तुझमे  कांति  नभ  छूने  की  

व्योम  के  ध्रुव  को  प्रकाशित   करने  की  

उर्जा  तुझमे  अनंत 

दृढ़ता  तुझमे   प्रचंड 

क्यूँ  रोकूँ  मैं  तुझे ....

तू  आत्मा  विश्वास  का  जीवंत  स्वरुप  

मनुष्य  की  प्रचुर  चेष्टा  का  प्रतीक 

तुझमे  बसी  गंगा  की  धार 

गिर  के  उठी  तू  बार  बार  

क्यूँ  रोकूँ  मैं  तुझे ...

तू  निरंतर  जीवन  का  अमित  सार 

प्रकृति  के  चिरंजीवी  का  स्वरुप  साकार |

कैसे रोकूँ  मैं  तुझे ....

PS :dedicated to a father on what he is feeling for his daughter's success and the comments of the society for her travel abroad

IRCTC sucks !!!

A pathetic experience with the tatkal booking option of irctc.What were you thinking when you designed that stupid webpage , that it's for show and people wouldn't be using it for tatkal bookings or that the population of India is close to germany or france. Wake up , close to 2 lakhs are planning to book a train ticket in tatkal every day....

Being in India, you should know Indian realities. But including the railway ministry , the irctc folks either don't have technical understanding of India's needs or they are just as dumb.

Idiotic moves by Indian Railways

1. Tatkal window opens only 24 hrs before.
2. There are only 4 seats per train per class in Tatkal,
3. The site goes for a toss at 8:00 am.
4. The ajax field takes ages to load when required including server error 503
5. After all this if u r able to submit your request , a server error 200 throws up.
6. Finally at 8:30 if u r able to reach somewhere , a regret list is awaiting your request.

Guys, do us a favour , close the tatkal.

I don't know but it seems Railways has been trying to boost the Indian Airlines sector, for what else would explain the failure.

I do have face to face evidence working of the Indian railways while doing my development of corporate citizenship project in Pune. All we wanted was to estimate the feasibility of planting trees alongside railway tracks. However the department seemed to be too busy just running the trains and it seemed everything worked on jugaad.

There was a silver lining somewhere but the clouds around in Indian railways are very dark.....

I wish Laloo is back .. His being in railways improved the services and policies both for Indian railways and also for Bihar...

Regards,
Amrit

SPJIMR : Will I miss you?

Most of the answers to the questions that I ask myself find a common answer "I don't know". Bloody hell, why don't I know the answers to most of my questions. Today I asked myself a simple question , will I miss SP Jain and again stumbled upon the same futile answer " I don't know". Seriously I am fed up of this monotonous student of life, i.e me , who does not have any answer for me. 

Ok, let's probe further, what's there to miss in a college besides the usual "it's natural to miss your college". Just because you have been with something or somewhere for the last 2 years , do you miss it . Do I miss all the couplet years of my life. No I don't, I don't even remember most of my life. 

So the point is , you miss the things you like the most. For example, i missed food and family when  i was in Germany. What is that in college that I liked that I shall miss.

Like #1 : I liked the classes. Yes, I liked them. Not all, but most of them were very interactive, if u want , you learnt a lot of new ideas and lots of good things about life. The classes on what management is or the story of a boy which I forgot in the Learning Management Class were exciting. Most of the subjects that I studied ,could be very well practically applied to any business scenario. I loved the learning.

Like #2 : I loved the night canteen. I am generally awake till 3/4 , so the night canteen was something which always helped me get the fuel.Moreover, you can always find people around there to have a little chit-chat, curse some assignments ....

Like # 3 : Optimistic, that  I am, I always believe in next time.However , if there is no next time, I would miss being with 101 E , specially some people with whom I had late night discussions and anything and everything.

Like #4 : I shall miss Moments like Anandwan and PG lab , which gave u a high !

I guess that's my short list. Let the college be over and let me see what actually shall I miss .....